My Heart Hurts Today

It has been exactly a year since we started our adoption. Last October was All About the Adoption. We were doing our paperwork, meeting with our caseworker, having our homestudy; it was an adoption whirlwind. And I believed that by October 2006 we would be close to a referral. And now we're not. And it looks like it is going to take another year. Referrals from China are coming at a slooooooow trickle. People who were logged in August of 2005 still don't have referrals and probably aren't going to by the time October is over.

Yesterday morning my husband said: I guess we're just going to have to resign ourselves to the idea that we are going to travel in 2008. I managed to put THAT out of my mind for most of the time we were at the Party of the Year, but I also drank too much coffee while we were there and I was restless all night. I woke up feeling like my heart weighs 45 pounds.

So I guess I just spend the next year doing what I've done for the past year: try to stay busy. Join more groups, get involved in new activities, don't let myself think too much for too long. I have lots of baby knitting I can do, and I still have a quilt to make. I'm looking forward to this



being available in yellow again soon because right now our crib looks like this



It'll be nice to have the room done.